Diplomacy and it's Verve

The author lost his parents at a very young age and thereafter braved many adverse currents of life from time to time. He did not come across saints/ erudites or well wishers who could guide and put him on the right path. Due to lack of diplomacy which is a skill and tact in dealing with people he suffered a lot and feels that lucky are those who are instilled with this art of handling people with the help of parents and learned souls. This small treatise is the nut shell of his experience and advice etc. to become a beacon light for others in odd situations.

Persons of straight forward nature, sometimes, in anger hurl salvos of curt and harsh words on others which leads to disharmony, unending and simmering of cold war of hearts or under-current of tension which is dangerous for the individual and society. It should be avoided at any cost. It is better to lose an argument than a person. It is a sign of one’s skill. Hatred, jealousy, ego and rancour simply rebound on us with double the force.

Wishing well the opponent melts away even the strongest ego. Appreciating and encouraging someone doing worthy jobs does the same trick.

Lord Buddha had realized long ago that misery is the result of our wrong actions and reactions the remedy of which, according to him, lies in social and equipoise behaviour. It is a reality in the world which if can not be totally kicked out can be diminished to sufficient extent with alertness, tact and skill.

If we blend diplomacy with spiritualism and virtues we can get better result and we will sail smooth life. If we change our innerself instead of changing our face and resolve/ imbibe persistently the virtues in day-to-day’s life we will blossom and spread fragrance of our deeds everywhere. Unfortunately we don’t change our attitude because we have been nurtured so. The task of diplomacy and tact is as difficult as searching a needle in the hay-stack. We should not forget that vision with discernment is to see the things invisible. Besides, whatever is ordained in our life can not be avoided or blotted out but we can, surely, minimize the evil effects by taking some precautions. Also secret of success is in learning from the lessons of failures. Life is like walking on the edge of a razor. One should know when and how to knock and hit to achieve our purpose waiting patiently for the occasion conducive to one’s advantage. This is also the way to weather our crises. Such a person is having a hold and command of his own mind and other sense organs.

Sometimes the attrition and war is thrusted on us and thus Lord Krishna, through His discourse to Arjuna, in the battlefield of Kurukshetra, urged him to fight and not shirk his responsibility for the sake of protecting the principles of Dharma though the Lord tried His best to avoid war. The awkward situation can be avoided/ delayed with tact, through silence or unhurried thoughts. Also one can adopt a middle and safe path while dealing with others as Gautma Buddha got a cue from a song being sung by some women when he was in penance for enlightenment in a forest. The song was like this, ‘ Do not tighten the wires of the lute, they will break. Do not leave the wires loose. There will be no music.’

A person with skillful qualities will not use brazen ways to suit his fancy or open taboo topics or concoct stories to malign others. He will try to make all conceivable efforts to avert the ugly situation by not using adulation, underhand dealings or uncivilized methods. He will think for a while before leap to avoid becoming a laughing stock. Sometimes he has to do only a cosmetic exercise by telling a lie or to save someone’s life provided the act does not harm or hurt someone to a considerable extant. By applying diplomatic channels one can avoid many vicissitudes of life which helps in warding off vitiating the atmosphere and arch rivalry keeping the dead past much behind. We should not forget that a soft word turns away wrath but grievous words stir up anger. Sometimes to avoid abrupt flare-up the elders or wise people have to take the onus of the cause of the problem in their stride.

A tactful person will not weave a complicated web of malice around himself. His actions and policies will be conditioned with bubbly bonhomie nature making friends and well wishers all around. He will try to soft-pedal to patch up and assuage the differences between the rivals instead of creating sharp divergences. Such a person will remain limpet(rock like) to his position and will never invoke wrongful ways to quench his own power thirst. He will not be agonized under a small pretext and he will use well crafted language avoiding sarcastic one and will remain assertive instead of remaining hostile.

To become a real diplomat one requires enormous qualities some more of which are discussed further. A well nurtured person will neither treat anyone contumely nor transgress his limits under any circumstances. He is considered as a credible crusader and minion for people’s cause and will never usurp their rights. He is redeemer and flicker of hope of the fallen and will not be considered as a tout but a prolific achiever. He will take every step carefully exercising care and restraint and also find a way to circumvent the law. He will be capable of beating many odds in life and may try to make foray into his profession, prove his mettle and catapult to fame soon.

Only good will betide to such qualitative person and he will earn kudos and bag many accolades of others. He will hardly receive cold shoulders from others but his sincere and strenuous efforts will cut ice to resolve intricacies. One will not feel that he is rudderless and in very awkward situation he may try quid pro quo formula to settle the matter amicably to avoid fissures. He will never be considered as an inconvenient person by his employer and will remain etched in the hearts and minds of his colleagues for eternity. The knotty issues will be kept open to resolve at an appropriate time and try not to reach the dead end. He will never slam a door over difficult situations as he knows that, probably, he has to come back. At every success he will open a new bubbling champagne bottle. To conclude, a person bereft of diplomacy becomes a rolling stone and has no place in this world of today. Be careful, enjoy life and fly high.